Pollença Train

At the end of my stay in Pollença, I travelled by train back to Palma airport. This was an adventure for someone more used to simple plane-catching in places like Stuttgart or Marseille. I note some useful things I discovered, which may help anyone else trying to make the same journey.

The train timetable is to be found here . You may notice that the page has a https address. It is obviously intended to be secret. The timetable is marked as applying from 1st. September, but I'm sure it is not the same as the timetable I got from this link last week.

It seems that timetables in Mallorca should be viewed as if they were a Brexit-manifesto (or anything else from Boris) - they contain some suggestions of what some people may consider a good thing, without much thought about implementation and without any sense of responsibility for actually delivering the service offered. Calculate the time required for the worst-case scenario on the timetable, add an hour, and you'll probably arrive on time.

The train doesn't go all the way to Pollença; it stops at Sa Pobla, about 19 kilometres away. You will therefore need to get a friendly native to take you to the station. This is non-trivial, because the station may have moved since the friendly native was last there. In my case the station had receded about 100 metres up the track and across the main road. The locals had not thought it necessary to signpost this, or to indicate where one was supposed to park. Just drive round the ring road until you see a train standing in a field. This is probably the station.

The tickets are sold on entry to the station by a cheerful robot, who speaks a number of languages, in none of which it is completely clear which ticket you need to get to Palma. Make a guess, see below.

You then get on the train, which is waiting patiently. It does not leave on time.

It is not clear from the timetable whether the train goes directly to Palma, or whether you have to change. The advice from the friendly native was "If everyone gets out, follow them". What she didn't say, is what to do if they all get back in again. This turns out to mean that it's raining, and everyone knows that the train they're in won't leave until the connection for Palma arrives, so they might as well stay dry.

On the platform at the change station - which is in a field between Sineu and Inca - Enllaç on the timetable - is a modern display screen. This displays useful information, such as "Next train for Palma at ... On time". Don't worry if the current time is already ten minutes after the time specified. They don't mean tomorrow. They're just hoping you won't notice the details (think Brexit).

The display doesn't indicate which platform it applies to, since I assume it doesn't want to commit itself, so to be quite sure, you can ask the driver of the train you've just got off. He will probably speak enough English to understand "Palma?".

Eventually, the train for Palma will arrive, and everyone will leap out of the train they came on into the train for Palma. It will leave a few minutes later. In spite of the impression given by the timetable that it is an express, it will stop at all stations.

When you arrive at Palma, you will meet a robot who will check your ticket. It will not let you through the barrier, probably because its colleague in Sa Pobla sold you the wrong ticket. It just says „"No", and flashes a red light, without telling you why. Do not worry. Just stand around looking desperate, and a friendly commuter will open the barrier for you with his/her season ticket. The robot will not notice. If no friendly commuter is available, I suppose you could go back down the stairs and find the one human employee in a kiosk beside the platforms. Try saying "I seem to have the wrong ticket", or "Ihr Roboter am Ausgang ist Defekt!!". The latter, if uttered convincingly, is probably more effective.

On emerging from the station, you cross the road to the bus stops and catch the No. 1 bus to the airport. This goes every 15 minutes (says the timetable), so you will see a useful display telling you the next No. 1 bus will come in 20 minutes, which it does. However, it does go to the airport, and drops you outside departures, just in time, so all is well. Unless you're flying Ryanair (which I wasn't), in which case you will probably have to pay a surcharge for being late, or for being there at all.

However, it's cheap. Exactly how cheap depends on whether you manage to buy the right ticket, but in any case, it's about a tenth of the price of a taxi.